The Tiger Behind the Client Does Not Exist

tiger behind a bush

What is Fear of selling and why are so many folks scared or even paralyzed when asking for the sale?  Well, it’s not the tiger behind your client as you may believe.   The Tiger behind the client does not exist.   What you are doing is being afraid of something you are entirely unaware exists in your imagination.

Fear of Selling

  • Failure
  • Rejection
  • Proving to yourself that you Can’t do a thing
  • Past success was just a fluke
  • Confrontation

These are just a few samples whats going on behind your mental “scene”  I could recite hundreds even thousands of other things that cause us to experience fear, you know, like spiders or heights, but today, we are focusing on the Fear of Selling.  That tiger is in your subconscious, lurking behind every potential new customer.

As a result, you feel nervous, agitated, uncomfortable or even angry at the thought of approaching a prospect.  Naturally, we are hardwired to avoid anything that makes us afraid or feel bad.   In this case, preventing the potential selling opportunity.

Move out of the Fear

The first step to move out of fear is to become aware that your hardwired brain is the culprit for standing in your way of making that sales call.  Next, you must acknowledge it.   The final step is to use your mindset to remove the fear.  How?

Face it

Examine it

Accept it

Embrace it

Understand that all the feelings you are having are just that…feelings.  Check out this blog by my favorite Self Help Guru, Dr. Wayne Dyer on fear!  He really helps us to understand the fear and how its really holding us back.

FACE IT

The first step is to Stop trying to deny it.  That old cliché’ what you resist, persists is entirely accurate.  Recognizing that fear is standing in your way and honestly facing it by embracing it is  essential.  We are driven by our egos.  And if you look at the samples above, you will see that nothing there is indeed life threatening.  No tigers, lions or bears will kill you if you do not respond to the threat.  But our bodies react as if it is life threatening.  Your body pushes out chemicals that create all those “Nervous” fight or flight feelings.

This was an essential tool when we were cavemen and needed to be on constant alert of danger.  Our bodies react the same way thousands of years later, based on our thoughts and mindset instead of lions, tigers, and bears, physically threatening us.

Examine it: 

Lets look closely at these threats.  When we feel fearful, we feel it in our physical self.  Our physical reaction is proof that there is a threat.   Fight or flight kicks in.   We know consciously that there is no Tiger.  Since we KNOW we are acting kinda crazy, we make all sorts of excuses as to why we “Feel” the way we do.  The customer doesn’t “Get” it.  “I don’t want to seem Pushy”, “Maybe I will call back at a better time”.  So by delaying any action, we have avoided the physical and emotional “Fear” created by the “scary” sales call.  Hence, “Surviving to fight another day.”

Accept it:

Next, acknowledge that you DO Feel the Fear.  Face it. Breathe in and wrap your mental arms around it and send it love and respect.  This “Fear” emotion has been of service to you in the past, now you have acknowledged that it serves you no more.  By accepting it and not judging it, you know that this emotion is merely a tool your body creates to assist you in need.  Understand that there is no real physical threat to your life.  Accept that it is a physical reaction to your emotions. Do not judge it, push it away or deny it’s there.  Dive into the middle of the fearful thoughts and feelings as well as the physical sensations that it is producing in your body.

Master the Fear:

As a result, when you can sit calmly for a few moments in the fear, it will serve you.  You can master it and use it to your advantage.  The Fear trigger can also be an indication that you are not doing your best. When you sit with fear for a few moments, as opposed to shutting down and avoiding the feeling, you will become aware of more than the fight or flight response and be able to look deeper within yourself to know what is causing the triggered response in the first place.  Are you avoiding doing the hard things, avoiding a possible adverse reaction, or because asking for the sale because of experience from your past versus a very real current threat?  Mastering your fear opens new ideas and solutions to your current situation.

Embrace it:

Finally, move forward in a place of love and acceptance for what may or may not happen when you invite people to believe in you by buying your product or service. I promise, there is no tiger hiding behind your client.  Each time you feel the FEAR – recognize it as a mental tool that is helping you be aware of your deeper self.

Re-programming your brain to not interpret the fear sensation as a physical threat, but an indicator that its time to look deeper within and become aware of your inner motivations and habits that trigger detrimental external in-action will move you from avoidance to action.

For more about overcoming fear, setting goals, transforming your mindset,  I invite you to join the Ultimate Coaching Mastery Facebook group to connect with my tribe!  Let’s slay that imaginary tiger together!

 

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